New D&D Character Classes: The Scientist and the Antiscientist

Way back in 1977, Issue #2 of White Dwarf Magazine presented a new D&D character class: The Scientist and its counterpart the Antiscientist. These were the days of “humorous character classes” that were intended for amusement rather than actual play, though I did actually once use a satirical class (the Hopeless character class from Dragon #96) as an NPC. Here are the levels and titles for the Scientist and its opposite.

This is very amusing (“Administrator” as an Antiscientist rank is hilarious), but I would submit that we can do better and revise this a bit for the 2st century. For the Scientist I propose:

1. Amateur
2. Graduate
3. Computer Programmer
4. Bioinformatics Researcher
5. Geneticist
6. Biochemist
7. Mathematician
8. Virologist
9. Molecular Biologist
10. Nuclear Physicist
11+. Polymath

The Antiscientist needs a complete overhaul. As this individual gains levels, he or she becomes increasingly and outrageously anti-scientific, until becoming a full-fledged Vondaniken.

1. Illiterate
2. Luddite
3. Astrologer
4. Crop Circle Guru
5. Climate Change Denier
6. Quantum Healer
7. Scientologist
8. Anti-Vaxxer
9. Flat-Earth Creationist
10. Woke Queer Theorist
11+. Vondaniken

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